Boom! Crash! Blammity!

I remember when you were the new boy at school. All the ladies were excited to see the girl/boy ratio increase to 4:1 and your arrival was the talk of the class. You were quiet that first day, we all thought you were so shy. But you quickly became yourself, and by the end of the week, you were drawing diagrams of your mom's fluffy hair on the white board for all to see.

Shortly thereafter, we actually met your mom. She's awesome. You admitted that your hair and her hair are pretty much the same. So you fluffed your hair and it became very much the same.

Remember when you wrote this? Everyone looked forward to the days for sharing impromptu speeches and creative writing assignments. We couldn't wait to see what you came up with next.

Remember your beloved Skittles chapstick, which you always applied in your signature Grant fashion?

Remember when we were both stuck in the doldrums of Advanced Mathematics during your senior year? I do. It was boring. So instead of doing work, we invented immigration techniques for pigmy Guatemalans. I still have those papers. I don't regret how we spent our time in math class that year -those are some of my fondest memories.

Remember how you could never reach your own shoulders? We never did figure out what was up with that. You always just credited it to having massive biceps. Whatever you say...

Remember how you're everyone's favorite person? I do. After Luke's graduation, you pretty much became the legacy kid of PHA. You were silly and sometimes outrageous, but you were always genuine. People loved you because they gravitated toward your spontaneity and independence, and your goodness.

You should know that you started the Muse revolution at PHA and are probably responsible for converting about 25% of their loyal fan-base. You should also know that my mother is now mildly obsessed (I know, after all those years of disapproval). I thought you'd like that.

Remember being 'Mr. Knightonly' at the dance festival? You decided the ruff wasn't doing you any favors and it was too itchy anyway, so you wadded it up and stuffed it in your pocket. Didn't you forget to put it back on for the performance? That, I can't remember.

I didn't make a cake for you this year. I'm sorry. My pans are packed away and I ran out of time. Did you see the cake from last year? It had a giant fondant 'G' top. We sang for you.

Happy 21, Grantius Maximus. I miss you. You're the Greatest man that ever lived: